Poem

I hate it when writers write
a poem about the kind of poem
that they want to write.
The poem that will change the world.
The poem that will make that one girl's
heart break.
Or the poem that will make her
realize that he wasn't worth it.
You all know you've heard that poem.
I hate that poem.
But fuck it, I wanna write it too.

Short story

So lately in my Chinese lit class I've found myself easily getting distracted and reaching the point where I could easily fall asleep. In order to not do that I've started writing short stories or poems in class. Here's one of em.

----

I sat hopelessly in despar as the world kept on spinning. My problems are mine alone, the world had no reason to stop for me. Fine, I was horny. It's normal, nothing to be ashamed of. Might as well tell you the whole story, now that I've confessed my biggest problem.
John was perfect. He was smart, witty and a gentleman. He was there for my every beck and call, willing to do anything. The first time we met was at school. I was falling asleep in the library an hour before her class. I thought I had been sleeping forever so upon waking up, I was startled and made some serious noise. In the library. He had been sitting at the station next to me. I had startled him too but he went back to work.
"Excuse me,I'm sorry but do you happen to know what time it is," I asked as I tried to put my jacket on.
He looked at me cautiously, unsure if he should tell the time to a loud person in a library. "1:23."
I looked at him, stunned. "That's it? I was amazed. "Oh my god, I thought it was like 2 o clock or something."
He smiled and what a nice smile it was. "Yeah, I hate that feeling."
I quietly laughed and fell back into my seat. "Oh god, I'm so silly."
Suddenly he was interested in having a conversation with the loud ass. At the library. It was when he asked me where I was rushing off to that I noticed how handsome he was. Smoothest brown skin I'd ever seen on a man. Everything was perfectly in place: his hair, his glasses and his perfectly pink lips.
We chatted until it was actually time for me to go to class. We exchanged pone numbers and didn't talk to eachother for another week. From then on we started dating. At first it was the most beautiful romance I'd ever had. For once, my boyfriend was treating me like a lady, not his best friend who he could blow off whenever he felt like it. It was my first mature relationship.
As lovely as it all felt, I knew it wouldn't last. At 20 years old, I didn't want a serious relationship. Well, I did before I got myself into one. Then I realized how much effert and attention it took to keep John and myself happy.
Two days before our 4 month anniversary, I broke up with him. I told him that I did care about him, but I just wasn't ready. He was not happy. A week went by where he continued calling me as if we were still together. He wasn't ready to let go so I had to do it for him. I refused to pick up his phone calls.
And so now I'm single. Single and ready to...mingle? ha.

Him.

HE MAKES ME FEEL SO CONFUSED!

..And yet everyone around me seems to know whats going on between us except for me. Why is that? lol

Bueeenoo...

Sitting across from eachother,
trying to silently answer the questions
of what was to be.
In her eyes he saw what he was losing,
and in his, she saw nothing.
The remnants of the times passed
did not factor into her mind.
He wanted to hold her hand,
She'd prefer to have no hand to hold.

-------

I gave you every excuse in the book.
I reeled you in and then pushed you away.
You were a good man.
You are a good man.
And now I wonder if I shouldn't have let you go.
When I get what I want,
I kick it in the balls.
There must've been a reason why.
Lo que sera, sera.
You haven't tried to get me back
so I assume you never really cared.
How will it be when I see you?
How will I stand up straight?

-------

How so very strange to see you here...
with her!
And me...with him!
Months ago, last time we really spoke,
you said you'd have no time for nonsense such as myself.
Your girlfriend. And yet here you stand with your friend
who just so happens to be a girl.
How so very strange, silly little man.

Ok so these kind of suck but I haven't written in a while so lemme freshen up. teehee!

I hope this is accurate

I actually hope that guys do have emotions and sometimes even hurt just like the ladies. Not to be vengeful or bitter but for my own sanity.


The loneliness was beining to envelope his heart.
Men weren't supposed to cry,
or miss a woman.
He, however, missed his woman
and wanted to cry every night.
The absence of her warmth
affected him more than he thought it ever would.
There was a void,
and he wanted to tear it out.
He knew she would never come back,
but his dying heart hoped she would.

Jaded

I've come to find out why I am so scared to write poetry. Upon reflection, I remember in 5th grade I had this unspoken competition with a girl in my class. We had been in the same class since like 2nd grade and we were pretty much the two students who excelled. In 4th grade we had a spelling bee and I think she was in it, and so was I. We were representing our class and honestly, I just wanted to out do her. She left in like the third round and then a few rounds later I also lost (to the word nephew). So that was a success for me. Then in 5th grade there was a poetry contest and for some reason I wrote about the waste of water (true environmentalist at heart even in my childhood lol). So basically I lost to her I think and all because I didn't put a title on my fucking poem. How trivial. Anyhoo I think that it was that moment that triggered my dislike for poetry even though I keep on writing it without even noticing. Hmmm...However in 8th grade I did win the schoolwide writing contest. That was like the highlight of my life. Sad, but true.